Quoc's Web Journal

32 DAYS AND FEELING DUMPY!

I called in sick today... I am suffering from fatigue, the beginnings of depression, fear of work, insecurities, and just flat out frustrated with everything not being peaches and cream!

I set boundaries with someone that I didn't want him around me for now because he's manic and toxic... It's one thing to be of service if I have it to transmit, but right now, I am in no place to send out reserves of love to others when I need it for myself... It's not easy not people pleasing and setting boundaries for self. Am I doing it perfectly? Absolutely not. I am doing it though...

I am on the hunt for another job too... I am just sooo irritable and discontent with everything around me... I am ungrateful, irritable, horny, and feeling shame for feeling these things considering I have sooo many gifts in my life... So, what I get to do is feel the feelings, be rigorously honest and tell the Truth, ask for help and take those suggestions when I do ask for help... Set boundaries for people who want to offer me suggestions or direction when I don't want suggestions or direction and be okay with it if they get upset or offended. How they feel and behave and react to me is none of my business if my side of the street is clean...

I am just really messed up right now... I am avoiding the 8th step.. I kinda did a mini 4th step... I just have to formalize it by placing it in columns and reading it to someone... Anyone care to hear my mini 4th step of resentments? LOL...

Gotta get to bed... Thank you James for your continued love and support.... And all those who continue to send me good vibes. They are graciously and received with arms wide open!!! I feel undeserving of it, but I need only take contrary action.

Cheers...

Quoc

posted by Quoc @ 11:33 PM              E-mail me!