Quoc's Web Journal

POST CONVENTION BLURB

Hello there! The time is about 10:30 PM. I am actually not that tired. I just got done e-mailing a few people. I am gonna keep it short today... Not that there hasn't been a lot going on, but there is a lot more that is going on that requires a lot less reflection and more energy on continuing to be productive!

Comments about the last part of Sunday night through Monday is that I had an opportunity to feel desired and to apply my right to desire! I didn't have as much fun as I did compared to last year's convention dance, but then I know myself a bit better now and know what I like and don't like... I had the opportunity to sit back and just enjoy an evening watching and partaking in some of the festivities! I did not have to exert more than I felt like!

Afterward, I had the privilege of spending some time having a very late 1 AM dinner with a few of the guys "D", "S", and "G". It was amazing listening to them share and converse! I just sat back quietly and listened! I felt like a mere "flotsom" around these sober deities chatting nonchalantly amongst themselves.. I came to realize that I had a whole lot more common with them than I thought I did! Wow!

That was sooo darn encouraging... Anyway, a bunch of "other" stuff happened that I could spare the details for you folks to read...

The next day, I spent at the last open meeting at 1 PM where there was a countdown... I (and a bunch of other people) was presented with cake by my sponsor in front of over 500 people. That was really cool! Just a year ago, I was asking my sponsor what a sponsor's job was... No his job was not to pay for my stay at the recovery house! A sponsor is someone who guides me through the 12 steps of the program. Thereafter, I asked my sponsor, who defined what a sponsor's job was, to be my sponsor. How special is it for me to revisit this convention in a totally different frame of mind, body and spirit!!! I then made my way back home and had a quick dinner and a literal 5 minute nap before heading out to do my coffee commitment at my Monday night meeting.

The speaker shared about being physically exhausted but spiritually charged! Yeah, I can totally relate to that! I was physically exhausted from the on-going activities all weekend long, but spiritually lifted above "pink cloud" capacity!!! I was resonating with sober synergy!!! It's amazing! It's powerful! It's uplifting! It's one of those experiences that those who were actually there could relate to the feelings! PROFOUNDLY POWERFUL AND UPLIFTING! I wanted to share about how it was a year ago that I was at my first sober convention and having an opportunity to revisit the same event one year later. I am present, I am physically healthy, I am spiritually charged!!! I am not only able to graciously accept love, but able to give back some of the love that was sooo freely given to me! I was in my first week of sobriety and did not even know what a sponsor was. One year ago was when I met my first and current sponsor; he's guided me over 365 days to where I am now. I had the privilege of receiving a cake from my sponsor, be of service, and show another recovering person strength hope and experience... What just one day at a time done over a period of time yields experience in learning how to tame the raging addicted beast for one more day! Yes, it is indeed cunning, baffling and powerful, but with the love and help and support of a "Group Of Drunks/Druggies (G.O.D.)," I have been able to utilize tools in keeping the beast at bay just one day at a time...

Ok... Anyway, I am thankful... I am tired! I am going to bed! It's been a full day! Oh yeah, I got written up at work today for not calling in sick at work before they called me from this past Friday... I accepted the consequences of my actions, did NOT allow this mistake judge me as a MISTAKE, and was able to stay in the moment and move on with my day! Yes! That is what a lesson learned is all about! Not sitting in the problem but moving forward in the solution!

I really liked what the speaker at the last meeting at the convention shared! She is glad that people make mistakes! Because this is when I get to see how another person solves a solution without picking up a drink or the pipe!!! That is the beauty of making mistakes!!! We "get to" move into the solution! It's a choice! It's is a privilege! Oh yeah! I have a choice!!! God can't GET me sober; God wants me to move through life's challenges and stay clean and sober, but the other part is, "I gotta want it too!!!" God wants me sober; I have to want it too. Simple!!! Yup! Too simple for this smart-ass addict to get! haha! There is such a thing as too smart for my own good, aye?

Ok, I said more than a mouthful! G'nite all! I thank God for helping keep me clean and sober! I pray for those who are still suffering out there! I ask for God's grace to continue to keep me willing to do what is necessary to stay clean and sober one more day! The rest will fall into place.

Peace out,

Quoc

posted by Quoc @ 10:31 PM              E-mail me!