Quoc's Web Journal

BEST WAY TO AVOID PROBLEMS IS TO SAY I HAVE PROBLEMS...

Wed., 4/20/05 6:52AM

Wasted evening? Or rested evening?

So I went to sleep at 8:30PM. I kinda knew that I wouldn’t wake up again til way later in the evening! I woke at 10:30PM and decided that I wouldn’t wake up... So as a result, I did not brush my teeth, shower, pray before going to bed, get my 2 gallons of water, exercise, do my 4th step, call my sponsor or the other 4 phone calls. I did get to rest up, have a day completely without the program to just enjoy the life that sobriety gave me, made an attempt to not complain (or be very conscientious about not doing so), had a terrific day, did really self-nurturing activities, hung out with a friend, smiled and laughed, woke up early Wed. morning to take care of the stuff that needed to like daily diary, budget and daily expenditures. So, all in all, the day is ok!!!

What I get to focus on: That because of choosing not to take care of last night’s chores, I chose to take care of my other needs that are very self-rejuvenating. I have today to take care of my business. I get to have an attitude of having a great day at work, doing my best and enjoying the life and people around me!!! I am not under the influence of a mind altering substance. I am well rested today. I am healthy and a good looking guy today! I get to choose life and living and giving thanks for an opportunity to enjoy today… As in the book Illusions by Richard Bach, I get to choose which movie I want to live today! I can get up and leave at anytime I want and go into a new movie. This is my choice!!!! Yes, I will have my cunning, baffling and powerful disease of addiction lurking just waiting to sabotage my day or those really self-loving moments, but I need only turn it over to the care of my Higher Power and trust that God will take care of that so long as I do my part and use the tools to stay clean and sober!!!

I really shouldn’t be counting, but I am getting myself very excited!!! I have 1 year, 11 months and 1 day clean and sober!!! Yayee!!!

I pray for a great day; to live in the spirit of not complaining and looking at life around me with a more positive perspective, seek progress NOT perfection, be self loving, self forgiving, patient, merciful, and compassionate to myself FIRST and foremost, then to others. I ask my Higher Power to place those people (including myself) that I get to be of service to today. I pray for willingness to not be lazy and take care of my priorities in maintaining my life. I pray for God to quiet my very chatty mind enough so that I may hear the voice of my TRUTH that emanates from within me and act on that. I reiterate in asking God to be self loving and self forgiving and patient with myself in my living clean, sober and a little more sane, just for today… To really see mistakes as progress and not condemn self as being a mistake and not being perfect.

Thank you God and those people that God places in front of me to help me and for me to help!

With deep gratitude,

Quoc

posted by Quoc @ 7:06 AM              E-mail me!