Anyway, how was my day? Well, I totally slept in then got ready, brushed and showered and got my 2 water bottles and headed out the door to visit the kids for the pizza party I was gonna throw them. I had intended to spend no more than $50, but I've never been really smart with spending my money. Alas, I ended up spending $100!! Ouch! So, next on my priority list and an on-going priority is to set budgets that I can and will stick to regardless of the activity! Again, I give thanks for the fact that I spent it on a great bunch of kids who really appreciated it; but I also have to be mindful that there are other bills that need to be addressed as well!
I then went to a HIV Dual diagnosis support group... Boy did I need a meeting with people like me! I got to get some numbers and network with people... I still do not know how to build a support group with people I can just hang out with... I will pray for this to happen; surely I do not know how to do it without my Higher Power's help!
I then came home and took a nap cuz my stomach was acting up again! Sigh... I woke up by 7:30 PM not really knowing what to do, so I chatted with my housemate "R" and saw what he was up to and was totally wanting to get out of the house and do something. It sucks not to have a car! Well, ask and I shall receive; a sober bud "D" called me and asked if I wanted to go to a sober meeting out in Hollywood, I gladly accepted! We went and got chinese food and shared it between the two of us and ate some... Wow the meeting was huge... I saw some of my bud's pick up birthday cakes! Yayee!!! I was willing to just wander and say hello... There were 2 speakers, both who were wonderful and delivered a wonderful message!
Home I went afterwards... I called my sponsor and now sit here wide awake with my roomie asleep in the room. Darn it... I would love to have my own space to just muck around in, but it's nice to have another body there to keep me from being alone with my head and my diseased thinking... I am less than 5 days away from taking a cake! I just asked the first few people to give me cakes for upcoming meetings.... I will have to ask my sister and see if she has time to come up and give me a birthday cake. It would mean sooo very much to me.
My head keeps telling me that I am not going to make it to the one year mark and that I am gonna relapse!!! I keep praying.. I will do my 4th step! People, please help me out and pray for me and call me and remind me how important it is for me to keep moving along in my stepwork and move forward! FAITH WITHOUT WORKS IS WILL LEAD TO RELAPSE!!! I hear it, but I gotta get it through my thick head to my hands and get to taking action!!!
Have a good nite fellas... I am thankful for today... I want to wish my baby sister "J" a very very happy 17th birthday!!! Wow, they grow up sooo very quickly! I remember going to her birthday all high just a year ago... All messed up... It was not cute... Sigh... I am thankful to be present for that... I will spend time and celebrate with her when we go to see Mamma Mia at the Pantages Theater...
Peace out,
Quoc
posted by Quoc @ 11:17 PM E-mail me!
1 Comments:
They practically had to *beg* to get people to bid one me...::sigh:: I think I was low biddee. $45. One of the cuter asians got $1000. Puts things in perspective doesn't it?
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