Quoc's Web Journal

Evening fello earthlings,

It's late right now! 11 PM. The weather has been absitively, posilutely fantastic! Not too cold, not too warm... Just perfect! I've been able to sleep comfortably at night without feeling smothered by the mugginess of any warm, humid, and dingy blanket of Southern California smog! Ack!

So, speaking of sleeping; I slept from 6:15 PM (when I got home from work) to just about 1/2 hour ago! Boy, so much for the nap; I am glad that I had the time to listen to my body and rest! I missed another sober meeting, but now I have an opportunity to work on my other areas to keep balanced such as to call another fellow druggie/drunk or work the steps, or read Ms. Big Book! :-)

I hope I am not breaking any kind of sober rule. It just states that I am not to mention the *ahem* name, but I may refer to it in more indirect ways! What can I say, right now, it's a very important part of my life and indeed consumes a lot of my daily thoughts and actions.

So, I wake up to 8 missed calls on my phone. One of 'em from my sponsor who invited me to Knott's Berry Farm's Gay night! I really would have liked to go, but I am glad that I got rest. I have a full weekend ahead of me with throwing a pizza party for the kids in the next door of my former recovery house and going out with a fellow housemate and his sponsor for his sober natal birthday outing to Universal Studios.

So, yeah, I got the ONE message from my sponsor and I am thinking what the heck, I feel sooo loved, I got 7 other messages (from the 7 missed calls). I was laughing as I heard each one... They were from the adorable kids all excited about tomorrow's party! They have come together and coordinated a party with assignments delegated as to who brings utensils, food, all the way to the table and chairs! Haha! These kids I would hire to put on an event!!! See, give someone enough incentive and watch them spring into action! I am really proud of these kids and was left tickled pink listening to the succession and development of each voice message from one kid to the other! I was getting a play by play update on who was doing what when! LOL (laughing out loud). More than anything, I love how excited and charged up the kids are about this party! I just meant for it to be a simple party, but it means the world to them! This kind of positive energy, I understand now is the phrase "truly infectious!" This is the kind of stuff that I want to be pervasive around the neighborhood, community and the WORLD! I graciously accept this radiant energy!!!

I hear my colleagues at work share that my energy and attitude is infectious in the office. I didn't quite know what that meant until just about 1/2 an hour ago! Yayee!!! It feels good to be on the receiving end of good energy; but moreso, it feels even more wonderful to know that I planted the seed that blossomed into this burst of synergy! Karma, be it bad or good... it truly comes back!

How did my day go?

I went to orientation at work today! I am proud to say that I work for the AIDS Healthcare Foundation(Anyone interested in finding out more about it: aidshealth.org)
!!! It's everything I have dreamed of working or getting started on the path of doing something that will give back to the community (locally or globally). Being a client of AHF as well, I am able to serve on the team that does REALLY wonderful things to move the world into a healthier place in the future to come! During ice-breakers in orientation, I was candid enough share the fact that I am in recovery from drug abuse and also am HIV positive... The reason why I am working with this organization is because of the fact that I have been on the receiving end of such TLC! I wanted them to see the result of all the hard work they put in; it DOES PAY OFF! Because each of us are willing to do our part in moving one rock, stone or pebble... in unison, we've been able to move a whole mountain!!! Yes, every little bit counts and at the end of the tunnel, we see and feel monumental change effected!

My body didn't take to my meds too well today, but it's just an on-going process. I submit to the fact that taking HIV meds that is saving/preventing me from long term and much more serious medical conditions does have certain side effects. Uncomfortable, but tolerable I suppose. I move into gratitude!!!

Lastly, I ordered tickets to go see Mamma Mia. I hope that my sis "J" and Mom will be able to go and see the show on June 12, 8 PM. It's the last showing out here at the Pantages! If not, I will go with my sis' to see it on closing night. I am thankful to be able to spend a little of my hard earned cash to give my sister a nice gift that she really enjoys. Goodness, knows it a small price to pay considering I was willing to fork over and throw up insane tens of thousands of dollars for drugs back in the day!

Ok, I am wide awake and very happy! If I had a car, I'd be driving out to the beach or somewhere like Downtown disney and walk around... That would be nice. I am in the middle of crack central though where there is gang rivaling violence; so I guess it is best I stay indoors for the evening until day break!

I give thanks for one more day alive and one more day clean and sober! That is what I am guaranteed by staying in recovery... Everything else is whipped cream and blessings that I am gettng over and beyond the ration I would ever imagined possible. Also everything else is all perception and choice; and the cool thing my sponsor reminds me time and time again is that I have a choice to refocus my perception at any given point! Perception is reality, but I can make a choice to change that reality, most of the time from negativity to a bit more happy, joyous and free.

I pray that you all had some happy, joyous and freedom in the passing day. If not, tomorrow brings a new day, fresh and clean with no mistakes! Ah for heaven sakes, I can make that decision to change... RIGHT NOW! or NOW!.... or.... NOW! Get the picture?

Thankfully and humbly yours,

Quoc (360 days clean of all mind-altering substances!!!)

posted by Quoc @ 11:06 PM              E-mail me!