What is new? Well, I am back from a long departure with the macroworld... It's a scary transition... I have been in the safer confines of a microworld, so I know how to live clean and sober given the multitude of challenges going on in this very moment... Oh what an order! I was blessed with a job prior to graduation so I would have some sort of income to start off with... An employment agency hooked me up with that... I started 2 weeks ago... Well, this past Friday, April 23, 2004 at about 5:00 PM, I was called into the Temp Agency to be informed that the company was letting me go because I was a bad match... Why? They perceive me as highly motivated, ambitious, young, and high functioning; in essence overqualified and feel that in time I would grow tired of my position and would leave the company! They are seeking someone who would be comfortable being sedimentary and stay with the company for a long period of time with little to no growth... On any other occasion, I would take this as a high compliment, but the point is that I am being denied a stable paycheck!!! Just like "faith without work," TALENT WITHOUT WORK will not pay any of my bills and put bread on my table!!! Holy MOther of God! Anyway, I was trippin' and crying for a minute, but recovery tools kicked in and I was compelled to trust that I had something to learn from this experience and that greater things have yet to come... I remembered that in this given moment, I am in a better place than I was when I first came into recovery. I moved into gratitude, called my sponsor, called a friend, went to a meeting, and prayed before going to bed.
So okay, that part of me that wants to move way from "staying in the moment" and worry about the future comes in because that is what I have been accustomed to. It really wants to propel me to get the f*ck its and just get frustrated and fix by going out and doing something self destructive. Well, thankfully, retracting back to staying in this given moment and evaluating what I have RIGHT NOW shows me that: I have clothes to wear, a roof over my head, a bed to sleep in, food to eat, good people around me that LOVE ME, my rent is paid for this month, and some money in my pocket to spend... Oh yeah, I managed not to throw it all away by doing one thing: I STAYED AWAY FROM USING DRUGS OR ALCOHOL one more day!!! Wahoo!!!!
So, I look forward to blogging more often... This really is a dream come true to be able to express myself and post it somewhere where I and other may enjoy and grow from. I welcome your wonderful replies!! Let other people know about this site... I hope that I will impart information that will help you grow one more day as well as reciprocate the wonderful wisdom that you receive from your day's experience. I have to thank one incredibly articulate, eloquent, spiritual, intelligent, adventurous and incredibly physically gorgeous man that inspires me to one day grow this website into... His name is Keith... I ran by his website KEITHCAM.COM one day years ago and I have been taking the time to just read and enjoy his beautiful entries... I am excited about the adventures he takes, the experiences he has with relationships, his continued introspective exploration with himself and his candor and openne
posted by Quoc @ 10:10 PM E-mail me!
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