I wanted to share the fact that I had been missing in action for about a year to learn how to stay clean and sober one day at a time. I recently graduated from a 9-12 month program and within the past few days moved from the treatment facility to a ??sober?? living house. I had been blessed with a job within the past two weeks prior to graduation which would help with paying for my first month??s rent as well as some spending money. I was hired through a temp agency and have been happily working with the company for two weeks?K I have been learning sooo much and really getting to love the position, the work environment as well my co-workers?K Alas, this past Friday, April 23, 2004, I was called into the temp agency to be informed that the company feels that I am not compatible with them due to the fact that I am ??young, intelligent, ambitious,?? and in essence overqualified for the position that I am currently holding. They fear that I would become bored with my job and leave them for something bigger and better. Little do they know how much I am in need of a job that provides a stable paycheck and a manageably stressful environment?K They are looking for someone who is sedimentary and willing to stay with this position for the long term. How can they make such a call when I myself don??t even know whether this is a good fit for me. So, one can get disqualified from position because I am OVERQUALIFIED! Sigh?K If only they knew how much I really wanted to stay with them.
Well, I have been taught the tools to live life on top of just staying clean and sober ??one day at a time.?? I have been taking baby steps from the microworld of my treatment facility toward the macrocosm of daily challenges of disappointment and obstacles. So, what did I do? I called my sponsor, cried, called a friend, went to a meeting and prayed.
Over the weekend, I have been able to move from projecting into the unknown future towards ??staying in the moment.?? I give thanks for what I have in this given moment: food to eat, roof over my head, clothes to keep me warm, a bed sleep in, people who love and care for me, rent is paid for the month, and some spending money for the next month. Oh yeah, I have managed to stay clean and sober one more day given the challenges, when by default and habitual life experience I go to self medicate with drugs, alcohol and other self destructive means of behavior.
Today, I do what is in front of me?K I have been unpacking my belongings in the little space I share with my roomie in a sober living house in Downtown, Los Angeles. I will shower, and get ready for my day tomorrow. I give thanks for another temporary position that will tie me over for the next week until another opportunity arises. I am compelled to apply step 3 into my life: to turn all of my will and my life over the care of my Higher Power. I realize that today, I am in a better place than the days before I came into recovery.
I give thanks for the opportunity to be able to express my sentiments and share them with others. Hopefully this website will grow?K I count on you folks for support love and comments?K I hope you gain some insight on your own life by vicariously living through mine?K I look forward to your sharing your experiences and wisdom from your day to day activities?K Share this website with your friends and loved ones?K I do have visions for this site. This reality made possible by my friend Brad (at bradheld.com), was dreamt about and inspired by a website that I randomly visited from surfing the net years ago. I have yet to meet this man, but I must say that through his eloquent articulation, his willingness to be completely open and candid, and just the spirit and energy that I feel just from visiting his website; I have such an attraction to him! He is physically one of the most beautiful men I have seen in my life?K His whole package just seals the deal! His name is Keith; his website is keithcam.com. I want to have what he has?K May chance give me an opportunity to cross paths with him one day! What an incredible dream come true would that be one day?K For now, I will start visiting his site and just get a very intimate peek into another man??s daily life of work, relationship(s) and just living day to day making the best of what we are blessed with?K
Thank you for all your continued love and support?K I look forward to corresponding with all of you via e-mail, telephone, and possibly one-on-one in the days to come. I have been blessed with another opportunity at life. I am not about to let that go this go around?K Just one day at a time?K If no one has told you today?K I love you.
Thankfully,
Quoc
posted by Quoc @ 8:53 PM E-mail me!
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